Posts Tagged ‘Red Ferrari’
Rich Kids Red Cars
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Rich Kids of Instagram Blog
The Tumblr blog Rich Kids of Instagram highlights the debauchery and excess of the spawn of the uber wealthy 1% `ers, featuring hashtags including Arm Candy (in this case, expensive designer bracelets and spendy watches) to Bottles and Models (extreme partying with ultra luxe bottles of champagne while accompanied by hot models) and of course, Toys… helicopters, private jets, yachts and sports cars. The most featured sports car color is Red, with Ferraris and Lamborghinis being the most popular makes, followed by Porsches, Bentleys and Aston Martins.
Status Symbol Cars
Since these cars are status symbol toys, the Red sports car color is all about flash and standing out, not about psychological Red Car Small Penis compensation. These pricey toys are often purchased by Dads as gifts to their Rich Kids or paid for by the rich progeny themselves from trust fund proceeds. The rich Dads of the RKOI will often boast flashy sports cars or collector cars in a showroom garage as revealed in Rich Kids of Instagram pics. And yes, within the collection is stereotypically a Red sports car or two. Even the Rich Girls have Red cars or pink(!) cars, a pepto bismol pink Bentley, a custom pink Dune Buggy… Perhaps RKOI will spin off new blogs titled: Rich Kids Red Cars or Rich Girls Pink Cars.
photos c/o RKOI
Does Penis Size Matter
Nothing tells the world you have a small penis more than driving a Red Ferrari sports car around SoCal. And if you’re Ashton Kutcher, not all the millions you have accumulated from your films, tv shows and successful tech deals can make up for having a small penis. Not even having Mila Kunis as your new girlfriend can serve as sweet solace for lacking in size. When women are asked: Does Penis Size Matter – the blazing majority would answer: Size Matters. Obviously, size doesn’t matter to Mila Kunis, since her former long-term boyfriend was McCaulay Culkin. Mila Kunis must truly fall in love and love is blind and blind to penis size. Hmmm, maybe Mila Kunis does choose her boyfriends for size, wallet size, that is. Jumping from Culkin to Kutcher represented a 10x net worth boyfriend leap to $140 million. Nice!
Ashton Kutcher first popped up on the Red Car Small Penis radar when he bought a Red International Pickup Truck, the largest pickup truck in production at the time. It’s true! Red Truck Small Penis and Big Truck Small Penis. Double tiny cock whammy for Ashton. And now with his Red Ferrari, Ashton Kutcher continues to buy small penis humiliation on four wheels.
Red Ferrari Crash
Six years ago Swedish gangster Bo Stefan Eriksson claimed the million dollar Red Ferrari Enzo that crashed and split in half on Pacific Coast Highway in Malibu had been driven by a mysterious German driver he dubbed “Dietrich”. In this cinema stunt-worthy crash, the gangsta from Svenska also claimed he was just the passenger. After the Red Ferrari crash, Eriksson suffered the humiliation of being booked on multiple charges including illegal gun possession and two counts of embezzlement related to his sketchy dealings with exotic cars. Eriksson pleaded no contest to the charges and was sentenced to three years in the klink. Eriksson should have truly considered himself lucky as he could have been killed, instead, he walked away from the spectacular 120 mph high speed crash, attesting to the quality of the Ferrari’s design safety. The Red Ferrari, shown in the photo, was literally sheared in half as if cut by a cake knife.
Flash forward now six years later. The police chose not to engage a speeding driver of a Mercedes in Beverly Hills for traffic safety reasons, but the 5-0 located him later. As it turned out, this was the mysterious “Dietrich”, only his real name is Trevor Karney. Ironically, Karney claims to have been the passenger in the original Red Ferrari smash-up. Two passengers, one Ferrari. What, no driver? Karney has no fixed address, but states he lives on a boat in Marina del Rey. Shades of Sonny Crockett and Miami Vice, chez California. But Crockett primarily drove a white 1986 Ferrari Testarossa. And now to continue with the cake knife metaphor, a cake that commemorated the crash, complete with a bottle of Absolut. Let them eat a Red Ferrari Enzo cake, but wash it down with some Swedish vodka!
Red Car Big Dick
When I write Red Car Big Dick, in this case, I refer to dick in the pejorative, not the anatomical sense. Check out the Red Ferrari 458 driver in New York City who tried to dick his way out of a parking ticket by driving away from the police officer who had warned the driver, Julien Chabbott, to remain on the sidewalk while the ticket was issued. The Ferrari owner, an app developer who co-developed the app known as Line Snob, didn’t heed the police officer’s directive and even tried to drive away, running over part of the officer’s foot. Hmmm did he think he could get away sans ticket after pulling that smooth move? When he’s in line to be arraigned by a judge, will he be able to use his Line Snob app and jump the line?
Yes, his Line Snob app’s theme is where to go to shop, party or travel without long waits in lines. Wonder if he thought about the line to get fingerprinted and have his mug shot photo taken as well. The icing on the Red Car Small Penis humiliation cake is when he’s getting dragged off to some NYC police station, his blonde eye candy piece, Stephanie Pratt, from the tv show “The Hills” (Spencer Pratt’s sister, yes that Spencer Pratt of the famewhore duo Heidi and Spencer) takes off in the Red Ferrari valued at over $250K. Small penis humiliation as this was all captured on Youtube and the humiliating Youtube video has over 2,100,000 views and counting. Nothing like millions of people knowing: Red Car Big Dick.
Youtube video credit: Damian Morys
Facebook: www.facebook.com/DamianMorysPhotos
Update: Chabbott now claims that a valet was negligent in not parking his Ferrari and that the police officer erred in writing him a ticket. It would seem a simple explanation to the officer and confirmation by the hotel or valet would support the scenario instead of Chabbott trying to drive away and blow off the ticket.
