Flashy Cars? Flashy Cash!

You know what they say… most of the time it’s true. Men buy flashy cars to get attention and to get over their 40-something issues. Women experience menopause, so do men! Miss Anna knows all about this phenomenon, she talks about it online, because she has so many members in midlife crisis. She was telling me about how many men are willing to serve her and impress her with their flashy cash, their own versions of red car offerings for their Mistress. Follow her on Twitter @mistressnylons

From jewelry to gift cards to financial domination tributes, Mistress Anna receives it all. She knows how to work these vulnerable men, how to make these money slaves happy and reward them for being loyal and surprising their Mistress with lots of gifts. She can train any man to become anything she wants. She is young and sexy and she loves older men with flashy red cars and flashy cash. And she loves to laugh at their small penises, haha! You can even see some of their small penis pics on her blog if you dare to look!

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Red Tesla Small Penis

He shelled out $70K for a sporty red Tesla and will now be shelling out for a spendy vacation… in jail, rehab or a mental health facility. The hippie driver came to a full stop in the middle of daytime traffic on PCH in Pacific Palisades. He began stripping off his clothes outside of his car until he was completely au naturel. But that wasn’t all. For over two hours, the man performed wacky, spacey dance moves while standing on the driver’s seat, showcasing these moves through the open sun roof of his Tesla. Paramedics and beach patrol crew patiently waited for an opportunity to apprehend him. Mr. Red Tesla Small Penis closed out his hipster performance art walking atop the body of the car. Apres le cinema verite, he was straitjacketed and taken away on a stretcher.

In the meantime, bystanders broke out their cell phone cameras to record the event. The entertaining videos and photos are making the rounds in the media and popular social sites including Youtube. Going totally naked in public revealed the driver’s tiny penis. As one video viewer commented, the red Tesla driver’s pubic hair was longer than his naughty bits. Small penis humiliation right there. This red car driver will forever be known for having a mind meltdown on PCH whether it was a mental health issue or drug interlude. And, of course, he will be known for revealing visible proof of “red car small penis” and live forever in humiliating internet infamy. His only consolation will be that he is most likely well-heeled if he can afford a Tesla and that he can laugh all the way to the bank while wheeling around in his red EV. Despite his small penis.

Red Ferrari Money Ride

Did these women really fall for the braggadocio of the wannabe wealthy losers conducting a social experiment using a Red Ferrari as bait? Apparently, they did. Sad, sad, sad. These women revealed themselves to be opportunists or golddiggers who would take the owners for a ride, a financial domination ride that is. Since it was a clever prank, recorded for Youtube posterity, you can judge for yourself. These women obviously recognized the red Italian whip as a spendy set of wheels. Their impression was that the owner would have to be rich. However, they didn’t consider that the owner could be leasing it and faking rich or even worse, a prankster. Maybe the Red Ferrari owner’s penis size didn’t matter to them if their nefarious intentions were to get on the golddigger gravy train.

There are obviously women who will sleep with sugar daddies, silverbacks and rich men with small penises for the luxury lifestyle. Using the Red Ferrari as the trap was so classic. If any other color Ferrari was used, such as black or yellow, it would not have had the same allure as the Red Ferrari.

Red Hello Kitty Smart Car

Hello Kitty Red Car

Now there is no way in Hell-o Kitty this red car’s driver has a small penis! Antonio Garay, 6′ 4 and 320 pound nose tackle for the New York Jets loves his red Hello Kitty Smart Car. In fact, using the Google predictive search, as soon as you type in his name, the words smart car appear right after. Therefore, he is searched more for his infamous smart car than his years of NFL stats! He drives this two-seater convertible, because he thinks it’s cool. And why not. Everyone recognizes the signature ride wherever he goes. His whip is anything but girlie when he’s seated behind the wheel. And there can be no humiliation for driving a sensible vehicle. When so many athletes blow their futures by overspending on pricey sports car collections, expensive cribs and other showy bling, owning a relatively inexpensive and catchy looking car is a superior choice. Garay promotes his own way of doing things while displaying his personal style, including sculpted multi-color artsy hair and customized iPhone cases. Perhaps this style-meister will go into personalized product design after his NFL career is over.

Rod’s Little Rod and Red Hot Rod

Rod Stewart Red Ferrari Hot Rod

There is no shortage of famous celebs riding around in fiery red sports cars revealing more about themselves than they realize. This blog has been documenting the relationship between driving a red car and having a small penis for years. Famous crooner Rod Stewart is no exception to the small penis humiliation rule. Rod recently confessed that his “little rod” was made even smaller by taking steroids to combat inflammation of his vocal cords during early concert touring days.

Most men who fantasize about becoming famous rock stars want to get filthy rich as well as bed a bevy of beautiful women. While Rod was getting rich, his rod was being shriveled due to steroid use. Instead of hiding in shame, he publicly advertised to the world he had a small penis by motoring around in his Red Ferrari Enzo, years before he revealed his small penis humiliation! Rod’s little rod and red hot rod belong together! Everyone knows that cruising in a red car is signaling to the world you have a small penis! Talk about total small penis humiliation. Rod claimed that steroids reduce the swelling in any membrane, not just the vocal cords, but also the “membrane” in a guy’s pants. Cue PSA for the biggest reason not to take steroids.

This peen shrinkage news becomes more timely with all the steroid talk in the baseball world making it easy to identify which players are sporting small packages due to ‘roid abuse. Players on MLB’s steroids list are not only going to be publicly humiliated by being suspended, but also sports fans will know each of those players shrunk their peens in order to play ball and get filthy rich. Poor ARod and Ryan Braun are now clearly among the league’s smallest endowed players. Oddly enough, neither drive red sports cars. Yet.

Rod’s Red Hot Rod at a British car show


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