Red Ferrari Small Penis Humiliation
Fallacy (or should I say Phallus-y): Buying an expensive Red sports car will increase the size of your small penis!
Fact: Buying an expensive Red sports car will increase girls’ knowledge of your small penis and therefore, your small penis humiliation!
One eBay UK “member” found out the “hard” way (hey, puns are just rolling off my keyboard) that a shiny fast Red Ferrari does not increase the size of a little dick and only adds to small penis humiliation, so much so, that he tried to auction it off on eBay.
Check out the 1984 Ferrari Testarossa depicted below. A classic Red Italian stallion featuring 385 horsepower, the Testarossa first debuted in 1984 and was named for the daughter of Ferrari’s founder who was a redhead. (Testarossa means redhead in Italian). Redheads are also considered good luck in Italy. In fact, Italians will touch someone’s red hair for luck. No luck was needed in the case of the Testarossa becoming an instant classic in the Ferrari line. However, the eBayer trying to part with his “red car small penis” Testarossa had no luck with his auction.
But when reviewing the eBay member’s auction history, to his small penis humiliation and embarrassment everyone could see what he last purchased: a Doc Johnson Titan Penis Enlargement Pump!
At least Doc Johnson added a caveat to the description of their Penis Enlargement Pump, unlike the Red Ferrari… The Doc Johnson Penis Enlargement Pump disclaimer detailed that some men declare the use of penis enlargement pumps as being effective tools for increasing size of their little “tools”. Others have reported that Penis Enlargement Pumps do not have any lasting effect on small penis size. It is acknowledged that penis pumpers can extend the length of their small dicks while using the pump, but have found their small penises will return to original small penis humiliation size after using the device.
The same caveat, it appears, could be applied to Ferraris…
Not only will a Red Ferrari not make a small penis bigger, it may also make it smaller! To all the girls who see any man driving it!
Image c/o eBay.co.uk
Small Penis Size Car Colors
from peewee, UK blog correspondent…
Men’s car color choices either drive women wild or drive women away. A survey commissioned by a prominent UK auto insurance group found that the right color of a car was far more important than its shape or size for women. More than 50 percent of the respondents said they would try to get a closer look at a driver and would probably flirt with him if the color of his car caught their eye. Three-quarters of women said the color of a car was the key to their attitude toward a driver. (Are we leading up to Red Car? Small Penis! Read on…) Last but not least, one out of ten respondents admitted having a date with a man because the color of his car created a favorable impression on her.
Silver was the sexiest color for British women. Perhaps the color silver reminds them of a life full of glamor. Incidentally, silver cars are 50 percent less accident prone, according to official statistics on major traffic accidents.
Black came in second in the survey. The color is usually associated with wealth, security and comfort. In a popular pubic stereotype, big black cars are for mobsters or those in highest command. Needless to say, some ladies would not mind keeping company with members of either group.
Third was Red, the color of passion, speed, daredevilry and small penis humiliation. However, there was an age gap in those who preferred this color, only 18 – 19 year olds and women beyond their prime (over 40) fell for red. Red cars were a bleak preference for women at their sexual peak (20’s, 30’s). Perhaps these women know the inherent small penis humiliation that these drivers are advertising when they drive Red cars! Whereas desperate cougars will go for any racy fellow regardless of his humiliating small penis lack of endowment.
Men who drive green, gray or white cars had better have their vehicles painted otherwise if they want to score. According to the survey, green, gray or white cars do not have any sex appeal for women, for a variety of reasons. It is believed that men with a penchant for green will always be clumsy and awkward in their approach to sex. It is also thought that the color gray is preferred by those who are indecisive.
the only man, dead or alive, who women would lust after in a green car! ~Sara
Car Shows – for Small Penis Humiliation Losers?
I was signed up with a modeling agency in Miami for 7 years. But since I was not a serious model, not a tall willowy anorexic girl, not available when the agency snapped their fingers, not interested in working for free, I didn’t get many ‘bookings’. I learned to avoid the pimp / ho gig. This meant just because the models might be working ‘it’ for free, meaning to add ‘it’ to their portfolio, didn’t mean the agency wasn’t paid to procure them. I couldn’t stomach that type of exploitation. And this is often how it works for the scourge of the modeling scene here…car shows.
The agency tells you that you won’t be getting paid for the car show, but that you can charge $5 per photo that some pervert groper, small penis humiliation loser or sleazy slimeball pays to stand next to you and have his picture taken while he slides his hand onto your ass cheek and grabs a half moon. Well, the agency doesn’t go into such glorious detail, but you know the deal with the small penis humiliation losers who lust for ogling hot cars and hot girls to compensate for having small penises. While the modeling agency might be getting $5,000 to provide 50 girls to the 2 day show, you aren’t getting ‘paid’. The agency tells you that some girls make $100’s of dollars at these events. Hmmmm, show me the girl who does. I know, porn stars or has-been playmates! Yes, usually a not so famous porn star or two or the June 2002 Penthouse Pet will show up at these events, but they will not only be paid because their hustlers aka agents have pimped them out for marquis value, but they also get the best spot (hottest, raciest car) and make more $ posing with small penis humiliation losers, while their bodyguard monitors those roving hands. If I had wanted to collect $5 per grope from small dick losers, I’d have been working as a table dancer.
Now here is the epitome of car show modeling, European car shows! Look but don’t touch models! Models are getting paid? Or are they lured into it with promises that their pictures will appear in international media: “Darling it will be excellent exposure”. So they are sold into pose-slavery for nothing. I don’t know any Euro-girls to confirm or not. But let’s take a look at these models and the rides.
It would explain why the 2 models are hanging around a Red car with ‘remind me why am I here’ faces, but not explain why sporty model in red boots (I covet) is so happy about her Fiat 500c (I really covet)!
Images c/o autoblog.com
Red Ferrari Theme Park?
Yes, it’s true. But it’s actually a Ferrari Theme Park, with a Red color scheme for the main park structure, depicted below. Slated to open this month, Ferrari World is located in Abu Dhabi, capital of the United Arab Emirates. Why Abu Dhabi? The Gulf region boasts a wealthy population with a passion for motorsports. The Abu Dhabi Grand Prix, a Formula One race, is held annually less than an hour away. Where else, but in one of the richest cosmopolitan cities in the Middle East region, would there be such conspicuous display of affluence and a plethora of expensive supercars on the road?
OK, I admit, if I had been asked where I thought the new Ferrari Theme Park was located, I would not have guessed Abu Dhabi. I would have guessed Las Vegas, but not based on high per capita income or abundance of Red Italian sportscars cruising the Strip. Las Vegas would have been my guess mainly because it has desert land in proximity where such a park could have been developed and it has a continuous supply of tourists. Or I would have guessed one of the Disney locations, as there are continual “thrill ride” additions to the Disney theme park empire.
Ferrari Theme Park claims to fame: 1. First Ferrari Theme Park 2. World’s Fastest Roller Coaster at 150 mph // 240 km/h 3. Largest Ferrari Logo in the World (note: the largest Ferrari Logo in the World isn’t doing anything for me).
Theme attractions: See above plus 1. Racing simulators 2. Theme park ride water ride thru a Ferrari engine 3. Ferrari Racing School 4. Video history of Ferrari Racing and the Ferrari Factory 5. Ferrari cars including classic and concept cars on display 6. A Ferrari G-Force Simulator Tower Ride 7. An aerial tour of Italy following a Red Ferrari driving over the road and more, more, more.
But I find it ironic that while this multi-million dollar park is opening in Abu Dhabi, not too far away, in Dubai, the largest city in the United Arab Emirates, Ferraris and other sportscars are being abandoned in record numbers due to the collapse of the building boom and cut-backs in oil company staffing. I imagine when this theme park was first envisioned, financed and developed, that the Gulf economy was not in such dire straits.
Image c/o Ferrari World
Free Red Ferrari – Humiliating?
Do you have millions of dollars lying around or do you have the qualifications to finance a monster mortgage? Want to live in a popular Malibu movie star and professional athlete’s neighborhood (Puerco Canyon) plus drive a Hollywood movie star or pro athlete’s worthy ride: a Red Ferrari F40 sportscar valued at $75,000? Then this is definitely the house and small penis humiliation car for you! What a sweet catch! But the hidden, or maybe not so hidden catch is that it will mean despite your massive wealth, what’s in your pants (besides your fat wallet) isn’t so massive.
Update: According to this beautiful Malibu house’s “for sale” website, the owner has changed their marketing strategy. Perhaps offering the small penis humiliation Red Ferrari as an incentive just wasn’t working to attract buyers. Now, if you want to buy the Mediterranean style Malibu ocean view house, you no longer get the Red Car Small Penis Ferrari as a bonus! Epic disappointment! But the owner is offering the home completely furnished, statues included, and lowering the price of the house by $400,000 to $3,999,333. The new offering will have appeal, but of course I’m slanted toward the previous deal with the free Rred Ferrari.
The house and pool back up to Pacific Coast Highway right across from singer / actress Cher’s $40 million dollar renowned beachfront estate which is also presently for sale. Yes, Cher wants ten times as much for her palatial digs which makes this house seem like a bargain in lieu.
Images c/o MLS.com
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