Posts Tagged ‘Red Car’
Small Penis Humiliation Equation
Let’s discuss the small penis humiliation equation. It would figure that a car company and in this case, Chevrolet, would showcase a Red car, their new Chevy Sonic, in a bungee jumping commercial. The bungee riggers pushed the Red small penis humiliation Sonic off stacked shipping containers. The Chevy Sonic grille made a slight splash in a pool below before the bungee jump rigging snapped it back up into the air. Everyone knows that Red is a splashy car color. Red cars attract male buyers with small penises. Dangerous stunts also excite beta males with small penises, so what better way to combine attraction with excitement?
Meanwhile, back at the Chevy dealer, any guy who buys a Red Chevy Sonic, well, it will only mean one thing, and it won’t mean the buyer is an adrenaline junkie bungee jumping dude. It would mean the buyer has a small penis. Chevrolet is giving away 10 Chevy Sonics in a promotion to popularize the new car model, a small and sassy coupe designed for optimum gas mileage. Chevy wants the Sonic to appeal primarily to a 20 something male car buying market. Let’s just hope that any male winners of the Sonic car giveaway will select a color other than Red, unless of course, they want to attract small penis humiliation. It has become an equation where if hot chicks see a guy in a Red car they think “small penis” or “small penis humiliation”. The equation is: male driver + red car = small penis + small penis humiliation.
Red Car Not Small Penis Humiliation?
Where do Red Cars not infer small penis humiliation… In Europe! As my friend Petra from Prague reported in an earlier blog here on Red Car Small Penis, that European drivers of Red sports cars are not associated with small penis humiliation as much as they are in America. When I emailed Petra these photos of tennis champions Roger Federer and Rafael Nadal with their Red Mercedes Benzes, she emailed me this anti small penis humiliation response:
In European countries, there has been a long history of flashy red German and Italian sportscars. This history didn’t exist in America. Women are more likely to be interested in a man who has money. So any man with an expensive sportscar is perceived to be desirable, unlike in America, where women will mock a man driving a red sportscar with small penis humiliation. And one of the key words here is flashy. Men who have money want the world to know they have achieved wealth and success, and a red sports car demonstrates that. It doesn’t always mean they have a small penis. Some men will buy these cars in their mid-life crises, but they have the money to do so, that’s the point.
No Small Penis Humiliation for Rafael Nadal and his Red Mercedes Coupe
Dupont, the largest manufacturer of automotive paints publishes an annual report of car paint color popularity by country. This past year the report featured the following results for the color Red: Czech Republic at 15% (Petra will love that!), Finland at 12.8%, Greece at 12.7%, Spain at 12.5% and Belgium at 9.1%. Oddly enough, Italy and Germany did not rank in the Top Five for the color Red. Germany ranked in the Top Five for Black and Italy ranked for Grey.
No Small Penis Humiliation for Roger Federer and his Red Mercedes Benz SLS AMG
Small Penis Blog
Red Car Small Penis blog takes a brief departure from small penis humiliation to write about the automotive market. Chinese and Indian cars are coming to the US. The cheapest new wheels since the Yugo (yes, made in Yugoslavia) was imported to the US are coming within the next few years. Will the quality of these Asian cars be reflected in the cheap price tag? Or will the quality be on par with Japanese and US automakers, but at a lower price due to cheaper labor in their countries of origin? Or even in the country where they’re assembled? One Chinese car maker built a factory in Mexico to assemble cars for the North and South American marketplace. Will these cheaper cars humiliate American car manufacturers or will the Asian and Chinese car makers be humiliated if their cars are of dubious quality?
Now back to the focus of this Red Car Small Penis blog… Some of the Asian car makers are talking about price tags less than $10K and better fuel economy than other cars in their classes, which will attract American buyers on the price and fuel factors alone. However, reliability will also be a big factor according to auto market analysts. “Foreign, low-priced car introductions have classically failed,” states auto analyst Kevin xxxxxxx, who responded to an email inquiry from Red Car Small Penis blog, but didn’t wish his last name to be associated with my Small Penis blog due to its adult nature.
“Malcolm Bricklin, of the eponymous Bricklin sports car, actualized a business plan for introducing lower priced foreign cars into the US market. His initial attempt failed when he brought the first Subarus to America, the first Subaru imports were of poor quality, although Subaru was much later able to gain small market share with their wagons. Bricklin used the same concept again in introducing The Yugo to America. The Slavic made Fiat, dubbed The Yugo, debuted in the 1980’s in America with new models selling for $3,990. Sales stalled after severe quality issues arose and the Yugo sales effort folded. It remains to be seen if the Chinese or Indian cars will become popular in the US. There is already a buyer perception in the US that products from China and India are cheap, low quality and break easily. People will apply this perception to cars that originate from China and India. But people may be willing to buy these as throwaway cars. Spend $6,995 on a car that will last 4 years, then buy another and so on. By the way, I love your Red Car Small Penis blog, it’s very funny and creative, but I just can’t have my full name in it!”
Red Car Small Penis blog thanks Kevin for taking the time to respond to my query…
Coda: There is one aspect of this Red Car Small Penis blog that may relate to small penis humiliation… How will women react to men buying cheap Chinese and Indian cars? Will it be the same reaction they would have to men who buy cheap cologne, cheap wine, cheap watches, that these men are cheap and most likely endowed with a small penis? In contrast, even though a man who buys a Red Ferrari has a small penis, at least he has money and isn’t cheap, well isn’t cheap on the wheels. So it will be interesting to see if women react to men driving these cheap import cars with small penis humiliation.
Small Penis Humiliation Reality
The bottom line reality is that if you drive a red sports car, women think you have a small penis and that you deserve small penis humiliation. Driving a Red sports car is like a small penis humiliation advertisement on wheels. You might as well have the doors of your Red sports car emblazoned with: Yes, I have a small penis! Or get a vanity tag that says: 4 inches. I think I would laugh hysterically if I saw a vanity license plate on a Red Lamborghini, Ferrari, Maserati or Porsche that was imprinted with a small penis size in inches. What would be funnier is if it said: 8 inches, as if the driver was truly trying to emphasize he wasn’t the small penis humiliation stereotype! To that driver, women would say: Prove it!
It’s amazing there are so many Red sports cars on the road with small penis humiliation male drivers! I see them literally every day. I live in an area where people’s identities are very much associated with their cars, SUVs or trucks. South Florida has a huge “car culture.” People feel they can read other people by the types of cars they drive, especially their income level. Or even assess the type of person by their wheels, e.g., a hybrid owner is more environmentally conscious and so on. I don’t disagree with this informal quick study analysis of people and their cars. There are different cars for different personality types. Red sports cars are definitely for the midlife crisis guys and the small penis humiliation losers.
