Red Car Mid Life Crisis

One of the major issues in buying and owning a coveted red sports car is learning how to drive a high horsepower vehicle without looking like a horse’s ass. This French Ferrari owner obviously needed a few driving lessons before tooting his small penis mobile around town. In the South of France, there is a popular annual festival of Ferraris where dozens of Ferrari owners show up to show off their powerful and pricey rides. Perhaps a little tip on how to operate the stick shift transmission might have helped this driver do something simple like cross the street without stalling out his spendy whip and drawing humiliation to himself from the crowd.

This rich Ferrari owner looks like he bought his red sports car during a desperate mid-life crisis moment. As one of my girlfriends eloquently stated: “Forty year old guys with money buy red sports cars, because they think it will help them get laid.” When, ironically, the opposite is true. Buying a red Italian sportster will help mid-life crisis sufferers label themselves as (surprise!) mid-life crisis sports car buyers. Ripe for small penis humiliation. Women view these men are pathetic under-hung fools, despite the size of their wallets. And any women attending this festival, perhaps with an eagle’s eye out for a man with style and money, will think this French Ferrari owner is a fool who can’t operate his shiny red penis either. He will have nearly zero chance of getting laid on the tachometer.

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